My Attraction Theory (Three COMM classes and Suddenly I'm an Expert)

I would like to propose a theory on how to attract males (I am going to say males because that's how I roll, but feel free to fill in if females are your thing).

Don't want a relationship. Don't want involvement from the opposite/same sex. Or, at least tell yourself that enough times until you believe it.

Apparently, it's that simple. Or at least, it is for me. Over the past two days, I have had about four guys either hit on me or tell me they like me, which is crazy (I swear, I am not that cool.). For various reasons and gut feelings, all of these men have been or will be turned down. But, why do they like me?

The answer is not a complicated one. Because I am not into them and because I am awesome. Since I am not into them, I can say whatever I feel like saying without caring all that much about what they think. When I am with Henry, I feel the need to watch myself, and make sure that every single move I make is "cool" enough. With these other guys, I already feel good enough, which gives me room to just be myself, whoever that is. Also, I am the best of both worlds; I like someone enough to appear committed (people are often attracted to people in relationships because they are unattainable and more at ease with themselves), but in reality, I am still single.

I cannot really be in a relationship right now. Spring semester of college is almost over, and I am hopefully heading over to the east coast to work at camp this summer. I also need to work out my love affair with drama that I discussed in my previous post before I can navigate a relationship.







Disclaimer: I would just like to say that I know that this post sounds super cocky, and it totally is, sorry. This does not happen to me on a regular basis, and I am still kind of amazed by it. Also, I am super flattered by all of the guys, and am doing my best to not lead them on, because that would be super super mean.

So Melodramatic But it Turns Me On

Alex: ... And you love it. You love it because you feed off that drama. You all love that drama.
Gigi: I don't.
Alex: Oh really? So you never wait until the last minute on a deadline or phone bill because secretly you kind of love the drama of not knowing whether or not you're going to make it?
Gigi: May...be?
Alex: And let me guess. When you were stalking Conor the other night, were you obsessing about him calling, constantly pacing back and forth and staring at your phone for days even though the date was just kind of mediocre?
Gigi: Ha. Okay, yeah?
Alex: Because you all thrive on the drama! But you've got to be more like me. If a girl likes me, great. But if not, there are plenty more out there like her.

 -He's Just Not That Into You

 You know that your life is a sad sad place when you can relate to something said in a chick flick. But honestly, this quote has been stuck in my head long after watching He's Just Not That Into You a few weeks ago. Because it's true, I love drama. And while Alex wasn't talking to me (because he is a character in a movie and has no clue who I am), he makes a valid point that relates directly to my life.

Readers, I am a drama addict.

This is an overdue realization, but it was definitely needed. I thrive on drama. As much as I like to hide it and say that "I do things for the stories", that's just a cover.  When life gets stale, I feel compelled to find ways to make it interesting, whether that be to break up with a boyfriend, talk to strangers, or drink way too much caffeine and call up Henry (who, I am pretty sure is attempting to friendzone me). Not even going into everything with Henry, that kid is like Hurricane Drama.

Sometimes, this can be a great thing. I refuse to let life bore me, and when I'm down, I look for interesting ways to cope, which oftentimes lead me to some amazing opportunities. 

However, sometimes it would be nice to just be okay with regularity.

But hey, that's what keeps life interesting.

Caffeine and Things like That

It is now 1:00am, which is most certainly past my bedtime. Still wired. Still so so wired.
Probably should not have drank much that much caffeine.
Two large mugfuls is apparently one large mugful too many.
I don't know why, but tonight I'll be writing in lines.
Henry and Matt accompanied me on tonight's adventures
a pool game that took too long to win to the sound of Matt
playing piano. An adventure
which included an extreme round of hide-and-go-seek/try
not to get mugged in my case (sexism at its finest).
We stopped by an over a store apartment and did over a store apartment things
Shapie-ing Henry's head, sitting on bean bag's, and reading
a book entitled How to Talk to Girls written by an eight year
old.
A horse mask fell into the mixing pot somewhere towards the end.
Walking walking walking back and stairs and high fives and scratched promises
to hang out and bad lines written about those scratched promises and
the excessive use of the word and.
Stream of conscious writing is a terrible idea, you should try
it sometime. Just break up the lines and pretend
that it looks deep. Yeah. Yeah Yeah yeah.. I need
to fall out of love with drama and stories. And leave Henry alone.
And find motivation.

Even Especially if you suck, writing everything you think as you think it is really entertaining. Try it sometime, it can't be as terrible as what you just read.

Hot Teen Slut

     After adventuring off and around campus with my adventure friend, Henry, and our other friend, Davey,  I ended up collecting all of the library books that I had on hold. I am currently making my way through as much of Write Bloody Publishing's author line-up as I can get my hands on without paying money, something I do not have much of at the moment. 

My first read was Hot Teen Slut by Cristin O’Keefe Aptowicz. It's a story in poetry form. Kind of. I know that a lot of you picture this when you think of poetry.

 Before you all go getting your literary panties in a metaphorical bunch, I would just like to say that the idea of poetry freaks me out a little as well. However, this isn't that kind of poetry. It's the awesome kind when Cristin describes her job as an editor for PORN WEBSITES... you read that right. 

It was a short read, less than 100 pages, and quite the page turner. It also made me super excited for the other ten books from Write Bloody, especially since two of them are by Cristin.

Poetry doesn't have to be scary. It can be its own weird kind of awesome (just like you).  

A Coffee Experience

     I can't remember if I told you guys this or not, but I drink tea. Black tea, white tea, green tea, cookie tea, tea tea tea. And water, I guess. And alcohol. No coffee. Pretty much ever.  All of my friends drink coffee on a regular basis, and while they dabble in the deliciousness that is tea, they pretty much stay away from it.

     Saturday, that changed. My two friends, Danielle and Maddie, and I, all went to go grab dinner before Maddie was off to her piano concert thing (for a class) and Danielle was off to do homework. My evening was most likely going to consist of climbing my own homework mountain, obviously I win the 'party animal of the year' award, I will hold for applause. Until a cookie fell from the balcony.

     I looked up, and it was two guys, Matt and Henry, that I was on an "oh-it's-you"-wave-and-walk-away basis with. I have had a few conversations with them previously, but we were never close. I briefly mentioned that I wanted to sit at this really awesome table that overlooks campus, and the three of us were off.

     The conversation at that table turned into a lust for an adventure. The rest sounds like a college remake of If You Give a Mouse a Cookie.

If You Give a College Student a Coffee

If you give a college student a coffee, they will ask the Starbucks baristas for four shots of espresso and a mystery drink, due to the aforementioned college students' and baristas' boredom and aforementioned lust for adventure. This will result in some amusing conversation and delicious drinks.

When they are finished with their coffee, they (myself and Henry, since Matt bought something without caffeine) will most likely be bouncing off the walls as they walk back to their residence hall to plot their night, which will make them perfect targets for the film majors looking for extras for a movie.

In order to be extras, the college students ask for direction on what they should be doing. When they receive these instructions, they ask for a reason behind them, to which the filmers don't answer. The college students let themselves be taped walking, and then walk away.

Being extras from the film has given the college students the idea to watch the filmer's films on the internet, which are awful.

The annoyance over the suckish films inspires the college students to go to one of the student's abandoned fraternity house (because frat implies bro status, and he is "not a bro") and burn things, creating one of the crappiest fires this college student has ever seen (all paper, my inner camp counselor was highly disappointed).

The burned papers and books warm up the college students for a short time, but eventually they get cold and hungry. The college students then ask for a pizza, half bacon and half cheese (because the main college student is a vegetarian, and appreciated it quite a lot).

 The pizza makes the students thirsty, which causes them to consume more coffee, which makes them restless and overenergized, so they ask one of the college students (Matt) to turn on some music, while they peoplewatch as the 2:30AM-ers return from parties and bars.

Watching the walkers makes the college students want to take a walk, so they do, taking their time around railroad tracks and spinning in quiet empty streets. The students see a school with swings, so, as mature adults, they make a beeline to them, talking and hopscotching and monkey-bar-ing.

All of this made them very hungry, so they stopped at a diner (they still exist apparently) and ordered food. While eating this food, they need to be entertained, so they asked for a newspaper to color on. Because it was around 5:30 at this time, the students also asked for more coffee (Henry and I, not Matt).

Due to his lack of coffee, Matt one of the college students was very tired, so he asked to walk back so that he could sleep. The other two college students (Henry and me) were still wired, so they asked to watch the sunrise. They didn't have a nice view from their room, so they asked to go to the lounge, with it's wall-to-wall windows. They couldn't just sit on the floor, so they asked for two extremely comfortable couches.

They asked for the sunrise to be beautiful and it was. They asked for happy music to listen to, and they listened appreciatively. Henry asked the other college student to hang out with him sometime, to help him figure out how to use his tea leaves and visit him at work, and she agreed.

The End.